"Don't move, you're surrounded by armed bastards"

[mooging]

I feel I need to do something of a televisual round-up of recent days. This will involve fangirling, excessive use of italics and also a little bit of capslock. You have been warned! 

Plus, spoilers for both episodes of things, made clear in the lj-cuts.

THE PEOPLE CARRIER. I am going to love anything, really, in which James May becomes project leader of something and Jeremy Clarkson sews. And ends up sewing himself to the fabric.

Okay, so it wasn't totally successful, and okay, Richard did end up holding the back up as they attempted to go over 100 miles per hour, but that is not the point. It was glorious!

And then, with their slightly mishap-y (which is a word, obviously), slightly falling to bits, canvas roofed people carrier, they had to drive through a safari park. This is the end result (paraphrased. Just a tad.)

JAMES: OMG THE MONKEYS WILL EAT US
JEREMY AND RICHARD: ....you do realise we have to drive past the lions, right?
JAMES: MONKEYS WOE.
JEREMY AND RICHARD: Okay, but say you had to stand in a phone box with a monkey or a lion....
JAMES: NOT THE MONKEY IT WILL KILL ME
JEREMY AND RICHARD: *derisive snorts*

A little while later, in the lion enclosure:

ALL THREE: ...oooh, lion porn!

And a little later, driving through the monkeys:

MONKEYS: HERE WE COME TO SIT ON YOUR FLIMSY CAR
JEREMY AND RICHARD: WAH THE MONKEYS ZOMGS
JAMES: Ahahahahahahahaha. This is my RIGHTEOUS LAUGH!
JEREMY: (in the back, as the monkeys attempt to get in the car) I am going to die.
JAMES: You can stay there, because of the mocking.
JEREMY AND RICHARD: OMG MONKEYS WILL EAT US

Also, I have noticed that James May and I seem to have the same hair-style (I use the word 'style' in its loosest possible meaning). I'm not quite sure who this would distress more.

Plus, Richard Hammond has the sweetest laugh and Jeremy Clarkson is so bloody entertaining: "That's like saying 'oh goody, I've got syphilis, the best of the sexually transmitted diseases'!" And his French accent is mockingly great.

Oh, Life On Mars. How you hurt me. (Thanks go to strangeumbrella for making me watch it)

Oh, Gene. The penultimate scene was just difficult to watch and yet he managed to do what he knew he should. And Sam trying to protect him from knowing that Woolf was dying. Ohhh, and Gene's repeated demand to know what he hadn't been told was bloody painful, and his voice kind-of-not-quite breaking when he said he'd have to arrest Woolf. 

But it was also a very fun episode! "Don't move, you're surrounded by armed bastards" springs to mind. As does "Oh Chris, Chris, post-office, post-office!" combined with face-slappingness.

OH OH AND Gene being all confused by Sam; that he always starts being certain and then Sam confuses him, to be followed by "[plot plot plot post-office raid], which I am 100% SURE ABOUT". Ahh, I love the pair of them.

SAM IN THE BOOT. SAM WAS IN THE BOOT. GENE PUT SAM IN THE BOOT OF THE CORTINA. And the fact that Gene kind of yanked Sam towards him when he approached the car, through the window. *glee*

To conclude, I love it and I love Gene and I love Sam and I even like Annie, and I like...um, everyone. 

I want a Life On Mars icon now. And a Top Gear icon.

Are you all having a good week?

Comments

[sarkastic.livejournal.com]

And the fact that Gene kind of yanked Sam towards him when he approached the car, through the window.
Is it weird that I thought that was SO HOT? ...Probably.

[moogle62.livejournal.com]

Not weird. Very hot. You are right.

...and I have chosen to use short sentences there, for some mysterious reason!

[rionaleonhart]

Ahahaha, I love your rambling so much!

MONKEYS: HERE WE COME TO SIT ON YOUR FLIMSY CAR

You are hilarious and this is the best summary ever. And 'I am going to die' made me explode with love for reasons not clear even to me!

his voice kind-of-not-quite breaking when he said he'd have to arrest Woolf.

Oh, yes. Hunt/Woolf may be a bit of an OTP for me now.

[moogle62.livejournal.com]

LOOK AT YOUR ICON WINNING AT LIFE. You really do have some brilliant quote icons!

I'm glad you enjoyed the summary! Just watching the episode made me curl up and weep with laughter, and then they blew up the car wash. *dies* They are completely useless and yet brilliant. And you know those monkeys had an evil scheme, which I have not entirely thought through yet, but I am sure it existed! Like I was sure about hat-stand crack! That may not be the best comparison, come to think of it.

Have you found any fic for the OTP yet? Is there any? Oh God, you're going to make me write it, aren't you?! *may or may not have already considered this*

[rionaleonhart]

That was obviously why they went for the people-carrier; they were plotting to take over the world, and May knew too much.

I haven't, which surprises me and makes me sad. Making you write it had not occurred to me, but now that it has: yes.

[strangeumbrella.livejournal.com]

I was about to say something in reference to one of your points, and then it suddenly struck me that it wouldn't make sense because you haven't seen the first series, which is entirely my fault for getting distracted from uploading. I have just started episode three again, so fingers crossed. (I CANNOT WAIT FOR YOU TO GET TO EPISODE FOUR. SRSLY.)

Also, I basically agree with everything here. Sam in the boot was glorious, truly glorious, oh and the ending and Gene, and the anguish, oh god. "I go in certain and come out confused!" (or something along those lines) was for some reason very funny, I loved that.

[moogle62.livejournal.com]

I CANNOT WAIT FOR YOU TO GET TO EPISODE FOUR - NEITHER CAN I.

I am actually thinking about buying the *gasp* proper dvd set of it...look what you have done. I don't have any money! But I would gladly spend some on shiny Sam and Geeeeeene.

The anguish hurt me. Lots and lots.

[misplacedmarble.livejournal.com]

Further evidence that we share a brain:

I JUST WATCHED TOP GEAR 8x01 A COUPLE OF DAYS AGO. And I knew they'd regret mocking James about the monkeys. XD And him being in charge was LOVE, just like when he was in charge of making the Reliant Robin Rocket (*giggles*) in 9x04.

AND LoM OBVIOUSLY ROCKS TOO. SAM. IN THE BOOT. *dies*

[moogle62.livejournal.com]

him being in charge was LOVE - I particularly like the looks on Jeremy and Richard's faces when James starts in on his Science waffle, or, you know, intelluctual, safe approach to everything they should do...and then a few minutes later it all goes to hell, and they all break the windows.

You see, the monkeys were clearly EVIL. Yes.

SAM IN THE BOOT WILL NEVER NOT BE BRILLIANT! And always capslock worthy. I have decided this :D