"I will answer your questions but only in the language of a crow"

[mooging]

My morning has not gone particularly well. It has been a tad full of trivial little deviations from nice, simple tasks that has ended in me metaphorically sticking myself to the computer chair and watching Top Gear clips until the stress went away.

I was making myself some breakfast. I had tea and Alpen (muesli). I had poured the hot water into the tea cup when my sister (who is 5) appeared down the stairs. Everything kind of spiraled from there.

SISTER: Can I have some raisins?
TEA: *gets stronger by the second*
ME: OMGZTEA.
SISTER: RAISINS
ME: *dives in the cupboard, pours out the raisins (not noticing that she is actually pouring out currents)*
TEA: AHAHAHAHAHA I WILL BE TOO STRONG TO DRINK SOON!
SISTER: *goes away*
CRISIS 1: *is averted*

A few moments later, as everything is nearly ready and I am preparing to go up the stairs and eat:

SISTER: *re-appears* Don't like these, want a yogurt.
ME: *gets a yogurt*
SISTER: *goes away again*
CURRENTS: *sit in bowl, waiting to go back in the packet*
PACKET: *has a tiny, tiny opening for a lot of currents to fit through*
CURRENTS: *go everywhere*
ME: MUST HURRY.
TEA: AHAHAHA NOW I WILL COOL DOWN RAPIDLY
ME: OMG WANT NICE TEA
MILK: *is poured quickly into Alpen*
MILK: *actually sloshes out of bowl and under the kettle*
ME: WHY IS THIS HAPPENING?!
CLOTH: *refuses to clean milk*
KITCHEN: *smells like milk*
TEA: MWAHAHAHAHAHA I WILL BE SO DISGUSTING!
ALPEN: And I am going soggy!

CRISIS 2: *leaves Moog a wearied wreck*

Yes, I did over-dramatise that. Yes, I do get perturbed by minor disruptions. Stop mocking me.

Meanwhile, it is the weekend and I have Maths coursework to procrastinate over, so let's play this (stolen from rionaleonhart):

Comment to this post with an idea for a Top Five list (for example, Five Things Top Gear Dog Would Rather Not Have Seen, or Five Times Laura Roslin's Desk Broke, or Five Monday Morning Incidents With Mac's Motorbike). Then, in a separate post in reply to your comment, I will compile the requested list, according to me. Multiple requests are welcomed.

Comments

[missfoxie.livejournal.com]

Oh, my dearest darling Moogling. The kitchen hates you and everything you stand for. :)

I feel bad about giving you Top Five lists when I still haven't got around to doing anything with the ones you gave me, but here are some anyhoo:

> Five Trivial Things Laura Roslin regrets not doing on Caprica before everything went s'plodey-boom
> Five Times Laura Roslin's Gone Barefoot
> Five Fandoms Sue White should totally be xovered into, and how it is to be done

[moogle62.livejournal.com]

> Five Fandoms Sue White should totally be xovered into, and how it is to be done

1) Alias: in which Sue would run rings around everyone, be a super-mega-double-triple-agent and fuck around with Jack until he snapped and locked her in a room with Irina. There would be lots of watching the video footage of the hot, crazy sexings.

2) BSG: in which Sue would instantly put everyone on edge by proclaiming everyone she met to be a cylon - it would take an audience with President Laura to snap her out of this. She wouldn't be exactly quelled, but would be quieter for a few days until she realised she could get more Laura sexings if she misbehaved. She would also go out of her way to stand and point and laugh at fat!emo!Lee, instantly endearing her to Laura and Kara. Adama would hate her.

3) Top Gear (okay, she's fictional and they're real, but it could work): in which Jeremy would adore Sue after she completed a lap of the track in under 40 seconds, despite the impossibility of such a feat, in a car she had Statham design for her from Mac's motorbike parts, powered by her lust. Top Gear Dog would fear her. Richard would like her, as they would both be ridiculously competitive, only Sue would win everything through sheer stubbornness combined with lunacy. James, the only sensible one, would try to steer clear of her, yet she would take perverse glee in making him as uncomfortable as possible.

4) Blackadder 2: in which Sue would attempt to illegally marry herself to Queenie (for the power). Queenie would love her, having finally found someone whose lunacy rivals her own: they would play hopscotch through the palace and Queenie would let Sue cheat - the only person she lets cheat. Together, they would drive Melchett insane, quite deliberately, and they would both compete for the affections of Blackadder himself.

5) The X-Files: in which Mulder would spend the next five years of his life trying to prove that Sue was an alien, a stunt that Sue would play up to at every available opportunity by wearing shiny antennae and speaking in gobble-de-gook around him while simultaneously trying to woo Scully, despite Scully quietly being driven to insanity by the pair of them.

That was far too much fun!

[missfoxie.livejournal.com]

I knew it would make you happy!! Because it made me very happy too!!

Your ideas are GENIUS. I can clearly imagine every single one, and I am loving them. I soooooo want Sue to meet Queenie, Jeremy, Laura and Jack.