"I will answer your questions but only in the language of a crow"
My morning has not gone particularly well. It has been a tad full of trivial little deviations from nice, simple tasks that has ended in me metaphorically sticking myself to the computer chair and watching Top Gear clips until the stress went away.
I was making myself some breakfast. I had tea and Alpen (muesli). I had poured the hot water into the tea cup when my sister (who is 5) appeared down the stairs. Everything kind of spiraled from there.
SISTER: Can I have some raisins?
TEA: *gets stronger by the second*
ME: OMGZTEA.
SISTER: RAISINS
ME: *dives in the cupboard, pours out the raisins (not noticing that she is actually pouring out currents)*
TEA: AHAHAHAHAHA I WILL BE TOO STRONG TO DRINK SOON!
SISTER: *goes away*
CRISIS 1: *is averted*
A few moments later, as everything is nearly ready and I am preparing to go up the stairs and eat:
SISTER: *re-appears* Don't like these, want a yogurt.
ME: *gets a yogurt*
SISTER: *goes away again*
CURRENTS: *sit in bowl, waiting to go back in the packet*
PACKET: *has a tiny, tiny opening for a lot of currents to fit through*
CURRENTS: *go everywhere*
ME: MUST HURRY.
TEA: AHAHAHA NOW I WILL COOL DOWN RAPIDLY
ME: OMG WANT NICE TEA
MILK: *is poured quickly into Alpen*
MILK: *actually sloshes out of bowl and under the kettle*
ME: WHY IS THIS HAPPENING?!
CLOTH: *refuses to clean milk*
KITCHEN: *smells like milk*
TEA: MWAHAHAHAHAHA I WILL BE SO DISGUSTING!
ALPEN: And I am going soggy!
CRISIS 2: *leaves Moog a wearied wreck*
TEA: *gets stronger by the second*
ME: OMGZTEA.
SISTER: RAISINS
ME: *dives in the cupboard, pours out the raisins (not noticing that she is actually pouring out currents)*
TEA: AHAHAHAHAHA I WILL BE TOO STRONG TO DRINK SOON!
SISTER: *goes away*
CRISIS 1: *is averted*
A few moments later, as everything is nearly ready and I am preparing to go up the stairs and eat:
SISTER: *re-appears* Don't like these, want a yogurt.
ME: *gets a yogurt*
SISTER: *goes away again*
CURRENTS: *sit in bowl, waiting to go back in the packet*
PACKET: *has a tiny, tiny opening for a lot of currents to fit through*
CURRENTS: *go everywhere*
ME: MUST HURRY.
TEA: AHAHAHA NOW I WILL COOL DOWN RAPIDLY
ME: OMG WANT NICE TEA
MILK: *is poured quickly into Alpen*
MILK: *actually sloshes out of bowl and under the kettle*
ME: WHY IS THIS HAPPENING?!
CLOTH: *refuses to clean milk*
KITCHEN: *smells like milk*
TEA: MWAHAHAHAHAHA I WILL BE SO DISGUSTING!
ALPEN: And I am going soggy!
CRISIS 2: *leaves Moog a wearied wreck*
Yes, I did over-dramatise that. Yes, I do get perturbed by minor disruptions. Stop mocking me.
Meanwhile, it is the weekend and I have Maths coursework to procrastinate over, so let's play this (stolen from
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Comment to this post with an idea for a Top Five list (for example, Five Things Top Gear Dog Would Rather Not Have Seen, or Five Times Laura Roslin's Desk Broke, or Five Monday Morning Incidents With Mac's Motorbike). Then,
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